Untitled #7

The yelling of waves
          angry 
   at the weakness of the 
          sand

#npm15 #micropoetry

(Posted on Twitter.)
Advertisements

10 thoughts on “Untitled #7

    • Thanks so much – again! – although I had to reconsider the word “weakness.” I thought it was unfair to the sand, so I changed it to “stillness” which makes it more tense and evocative… I think?

      Liked by 1 person

      • Honestly, I loved that you used weakness. To me it metaphorically said more about the ocean than the sand, so I don’t think the sand would have felt insulted 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • I agree with your interpretation, and “weakness” arguably has more visceral impact than “stillness”… although I’m wondering if, when I wrote this line over 15 years ago, “weakness” was metaphorically saying more about the poet than the sand? Probably. But I like the slightly more enigmatic “stillness:” Are the waves disappointed or jealous?

        Liked by 1 person

      • It depends whether the poet saw himself as the sand or the ocean. With the ‘weakness’, I read it as a sort of psychological transference by the ocean, actually. I immediately thought the ocean realized its own restlessness was a form of weakness and was therefore angered by the sand’s strength of being at rest. Ironic, because the sand was created by the restlessness of the waves. So many meanings and lessons in that poem. Maybe in my case the reader was the ocean

        Liked by 1 person

Comment Section/Memory Hole

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s